


What defines me?

by KisaTM



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Born Half-Ghoul Kaneki, Can I do it?, Cannibalistic Thoughts, Daddy Kink, Kisa is going to try to make this smutty, M/M, Manipulation, Master/Pet, Trying to drop the fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-26
Updated: 2016-04-04
Packaged: 2018-05-29 05:26:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6361258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KisaTM/pseuds/KisaTM
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'd so write more if it wasn't 4 am... Next update is going to tarnish every holy thought easter may or may not bring you!</p>
        </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to your New Home

"Cochlea is a pretty big place." This large human male says to me as we sit in the back of a barred van. I can't see out the windows, because of the thick mesh over them. The van looked bigger on the outside, but inside had thick walls and cold metal seats. The humans put down a thin blanket for me to sit on, before I was handcuffed to the cold seat. They put something in my eye to make me sleepy, before one of them got in the back and sat across from me. He has a friendly smile. "But, you'll be safe there."

"Shinohara-san...?" I slur out. The bumpy ride almost made me bite my tongue, which didn't really want to stay in my mouth. I was feeling weird and was glad I was able to lay down on the bench-like seat. "Am... Am I in trouble... Are they going to... Turn me into juice?"

"Uh, well..." The human's eyes casted down. He was looking for a response for a delicate child who had a sheltered life. A child that wasn't there. I knew what I had done, I was proud I did it. Although I wasn't going to admit that to the humans. "No, no. We are going to help you."

"Dad... He went there." I looked up at the roof. "Mom said the bastard was turn to juice... She said I would also become juice if I was bad..."

"Well, she was wrong." He's lying, even dazed I can see the signs of a liar. "Your father probably went there to get help. We do offer jobs to our best long term pris- patients. You might see him there."

The rest of the ride I had fallen asleep, until the van stopped and they were taking my hand cuffs off. They jabbed me in the eye again when they noticed and I cried out in pain. I tumbled out onto the snowy ground holding my bleeding eye. That stupid human. I dig the sharp object out of my face, pulling my eye out in the process. I crush the white an gray orb and throw the remains with the needle onto the ground. I'm going to fucking-!? A different human is standing before me. He's kind of blurry, the one who jabbed me took out my good eye. Or could it just be whatever they were injecting into me. I growl out of annoyance.

"Hmm?" I can't really tell his expression. He seemed to have turned to face me? Damnit, screw eye site. Screw this lame eye as well! Something stopped my clawed hand. I damaged my other stupid eye enough that everything just looked like shadows. Black and white. It was that human. Is he human? He smells different, kind of, familiar...

"Da... Daddy?" I ask, before everything went completely dark.


	2. Parent

[2 years later]

 

"Ar-i-ma-kun..." I cheerfully sing as I skipped into the interview room. The human was sitting deliciously at the table, in his usual white dressing. His hair was still it's unusual navy colour, though I could swear it was a little lighter than when I first formally met him.

"Kaneki-chan." He looked up from the book he was reading. His glasses are thicker it seems, it amazes me that humans have such need for things like that. "Still having problems with your left eye?"

"No, why?" I scoff, the irony this human says talking about a bad eye. "Did it regenerate wrong?"

"Uh, no." Why did you ask me then dummy? "It's just your Kakugan is active, is all."

"I know! Isn't it cool?!" I said excitedly. I recently figured out how to activate it when I wasn't just hungry or angry. There isn't anything really reflective in my cell, so I can't see it most of the time. But, it's fun to feel the veins form when I do activate it and I'm quicker at seeing movement with it on. When you're stuck inside your room for 15 hours a day, you have to find your own entertainment.

"It's not polite." The human said looking away from me, back to his book. "Maybe you need to go see Tokage-san? Learn some manners, it's been a few years. I thought you'd have a little more respect for us."

"I-I do!" I deactivate my eye. I really didn't want to see that human again. Heck, I rather drink the bleach I clean with, then sit through another one of his 'lessons'. Way less painful.

"Hmm." The human looked back up to me as I sat cross legged on the chair, opposite of him. Sharp silver eyes, like two large juicy grapes. I wonder if they were sweet or salty. His frame could do with more meat. Most of the humans I talk with these days are quite the prize winning hogs. Though I guess lean meat is just as good. "I hear you are working as a janitor on level 2. How's that going."

"Good." I snap out of my thoughts after gazing at his thin lips for a little too long. I cracked my back a little and sat up a bit more. "Still watched by six rookies when I'm out, but it's okay. The cleaning staff seem nice. They didn't even know I was a prisoner when I first started."

"As expected." The human leaned back on his chair. "We don't normally take in child ghouls nor, do we let children work here."

"Hide, is nice." I said, thinking about the blond human kid one of the maintenance workers has following him. He was super excited to see me and immediately asked me if I was helping my 'dad' as well. Before I could talk anymore to him, one of the humans watching me, shot me with an RC bullet. It scared him, so now he just waves and follows close to his parent. He only talks to me a little when we walk by in one of the many halls.

"And, your education?" The human asked. The education he talks about, is basic work that was well below my level of intellect. It wasn't challenging, so I don't take it seriously at all. Still get high marks on everything, though.

"Fine. I don't like that Fruity kid though." That moley shit-head clown. He is the worse person I ever met. He the reason I get in the most trouble, just because he tricked everyone that he's human, so somehow I'm always the problem. Just because 'I'm stronger'. Yeah, who is the one on RC suppressants and chained to the floor?

"I heard you got in trouble with Nimura-chan, again." The human sighed. "Care to explain?"

"Arima-kun..." This was utterly ridiculous. I knew what was going on. For some reason the 'doctors' believe that I think of this human as my parent. When I arrived they heard me call out something about my father in his presence, therefore they assigned him to 'raise' me. Mostly it was just a gentle way to scold a disobedient child since some of the humans here think Tokage is too harsh on me. It is, but I still hate the way they treat me as this vulnerable innocent being. At least this human gets it. He at least tries to be honest and frankly I like how he doesn't filter his thoughts around or about me. "What is there to explain? He's shit, and I can't believe you humans eat up his act like you do."

"Like you?" Well, he's got me there. I guess the 'I'm cute' card is used quite often around him. "Kaneki-chan, you need to realize that Nimura-chan has... Special privileges you do not have. To lose him would put your own life in danger. Do you wish for me to kill you, just because you're having a bad day?"

"You guys run a double standard." I sigh in defeat. I really don't want to be forced to apologise to that shitty clown. "I guess that's what these politics Maira-san was talking about. Someone is always getting the short hand of the stick..."

"You should just worry about yourself." The human put away his book and stood up. "Don't pay too much attention to what Nimura-chan is doing. Focus on your studies and following orders and you will be fine."

"I'll try..." I watch him as he walks towards the exit. "See you later Daddy."

He gives nothing, but a small rise of his hand as a good-bye.

 

*$*

 

[8 years later]

 

"Mukade! We can do this the easy way or the hard way!"

 

 H͖͍͌ͨŭ͔͚m͇̺̩̠̱̥͊̑̔͗å̦ͯn̸̆̍s̡̥ͩ͑.̫͎͒ͯͤ̏ͥ.̛̼̭̜̱̪̗͖̈̋ͤͯ.̣͍̬̘̠͢ ̥͐ͭP̥͙̄í̸̜̘͖̘͈̩͐g̼̟̹̤̩̃͌s͙̝̙̤͉̙̜̅̿ͯ̾͋̒̅.͙̖͉̞̀͊̄.̲͈̜̱ͩ͒̓͌.͚̩̼̣͇͝ ͍̠̮̘ͫ̔̿͐͒̈́M̱͕͖͚̺̦̦̎̾ͬ̇̾i̙n̷̜̪͇̠̹̗̯̊͒̌ͩ̔̅̊ę̯̰̹͕!̣͗̀̓ͫͣͤͫ ͓̯͚ͩ̍M̪̬͉͍̗̣͗̾̔͝î̓͡n̋̊̽҉ͅe͇̱̟͎̓!̯̯̪̘͙̑̋ͫͫ̽̇͒ ͚̫̬͓̮̰̔̅ͤ͑ͤM̞̱̩̲͉͋̊͗͂̇̓̚ͅI͖͋̿̎͂ͅN̸̯͇̮̬̰͉͗̂̄̐ͥ̅̏Eͯ̒͒̐̕ͅ!̘̦̖͙̤̯̹̌ͩ̎̐̈́ͦ͞

 

"Fine! The hard way!"

 

L̦̠͙̖̬̞͍̇͌ͭͪ͋i͚͉̹̝̭̿̑̊ͅg̶͉̫̝̮̼ͭ́̊ͣͦh̲͉̜̬̹̭̜͐͟t̠͎̰͖̝̦ͦͥͩͥ ̡͍͖̦̜̥͇̦̍̉ͧ͌n̸̙̺̻̫͕̭̻̉ͫo̺̣̩̪̮̒̾̈́͜i̶̼͕̼̺̰ͤͪ͗̋s҉̯̙e̺̍ͭ̈̍ ̶͎̮͇̩̎̊̉ͦ͆̂̐t̩̖̞̖͙̣ͥͅo̼̪̪ŏ͉͔̗͔͉ͥ͑́ ̭m̴̪͉͙̆̍u͖̟̪͎͍̇͒͘c͕͎̞̗͎͍̓̏ͯ̄̚h͇͓̖!͇͉̓̏͒ͫ̈́̒̃ ̹͔̱̱̬ͨM̰̟̞̥̓̅̌ͩ̓ͤȕ̦ͤ̓ͥs̨̭͎̠͖̼̣͌t̸̜̗̩̺̠͓͙ G̟͓̜͙͍͙ͥ͠É̸̙̥̩̜̺̏̎ͨ͌̌͆T̥̦̼̦̹ͦ͒ ͣͤͩ̓̊̌̐O̵͔̹̥̣̹͕͑̍̂͆͆͗U͔͖̰̝̩͛ͬͤͧŢ͕̞͈!͈͇̙̱͔̙͒͛̅ ͎̙̳̩̬͔͙͐̽ͦ̈́͂G͕̳̙̳̳̟E̢T̻̘ͩͣ̈̓ ̛̺͎̜Ō̤͚͍̯̼͖̽ͨ͒U̹̅̾T̫̲̣͚͛̐̎͝!̷̳̻͔̥̮̿̈́ ͈͍̲̱́ͫG̘̘͇͎̼ͪͤ̓̉͞ͅE̻̤͕̮̼̤̻̓̒̂͒̓ͥ̐T̝̖̩̺͚ͮ̉̆͋̽ͨH̥͙͉͇̱̖̑̌̑͗O̸̪͎͙͔̹̝̟͊U̞̺̟͗̓̒͆ͅṬ͉̪͈̪̓ͥ͛ͥ̊͝G̠̱͚̬̼̗͚͋͆̉̓Ȩ͓͈͚̲̞̤̄͆ͪ́̉T̟̭̅̍̊̂O̷͉͖͈̗̻͑͗ͨ̇͌U͖͖̖̖̹̿T̸͚̬̳͖̦͆̚G̴͈̥̻ͪͅẺ͛̋ͤT͔̗͙͕̭̆͛̐̈ͭͬO̞͖̦̲ͤ̿ͧU̴̅̐̀͗ͭ͗̉T̠̠̘̝̃̆̄͗̎ͯG̜̭̰͎̩͕̰͠Ĕ͎͚̹̃̊ͯ̐͠T͎̞͟O̐̈ͪ͐͟U̻̖͖̬̤̒̈T̛̟̹͇̖͙̱̙!̩̯̫̼͋ͬ

 

"Hold him still! Get the sedative!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd so write more if it wasn't 4 am... Next update is going to tarnish every holy thought easter may or may not bring you!


	3. Price

Dark... Again, just pure darkness. My body feels like it's moving through thick honey, so heavy. It feels like I'm burning up, I-I need to remove these choking fabrics. Where am I? W-who am I?

What is this? A soft featured young male stands before me. Pale skin, dark hair, and misty eyes. His lean form moving through the cloudy darkness. He innocently cups my face, yet his eyes told me he was anything but.

"Look at how ugly we've become..." He whispers with my voice. His lidded eyes gazing along my own pale bear skin. He traces his finger under my jawline, as I for some reason rest my arms on his thin hips. He looks at me with fire, a passion of pure desire and need. But, as I tired to indulge this carnal display, he disappears.

"Ah, no..." My voice travels from behind. Pale arms wrap around my waist and a male with showy hair rest's his face on my exposed shoulder. His colder hands reaching to caress my chest. "I think... We are quite beautiful..."

My breathing quickens as he explores my vulnerable form. My skin tingles where ever his hand rests. His weight on my back, and a more intense heat pooling below. I can't stand it, I want it... I need it... My body is going to collapse on itself if I don't sate this numb stinging.

I turn around and grab this tease by the shoulders. I push him down as I remove the twisting darkness that hides what I need. He struggles against me, but I somehow keep him still long enough to get in position. Without hesitation I lower myself, feeling the soothing thickness fill and calm the overly eager part of my lower body. I sigh in complete bliss as I twitch and clench around this length. I just kept sinking down as I relax more and more. It must have been large as it took awhile before I was sitting on his hips. I closed my eyes as I began the steady repeating motion of rising then falling back down. Becoming looser every time and shivering with pleasure as I gently rub against my hungry nerves.

"Fuck." I breathe out as my legs slowly began to tire. I open my eyes to gaze upon my imaginative lover, to be suddenly out of the darkness. My lover was no longer this small lean boy. But, a strong, unamused human.

His glare under his glasses, hid a rage I never saw from him before. It caused my heart to race even faster, and truth is it aroused me even more. I could feel my already flushed face try to burn more out of embarrassment then my shameless lust. I looked away as I forced my body to slow. I'm so going to regret this misguided piece of paradise I decided to steal from him.

I silently release as quickly as I was able. Despite the small desire to continue to sate my appetite from this body. I got off, missing the length that has now made it's mark on my body. I back away to give the human room to finally move. I wrap my arms around my bare body, refusing to meet those disapproving eyes. So I can only wonder if I took away all that I built to soften his resolve.

*$*

That's how it all started, and why now I have finally escaped the confines of my childhood. No longer a janitor for level 2, no longer a prisoner of the inner ear. I was a slave to death and a barrier to his realm. With a chain long enough to reach my bolted desk mounted with death's neglected paperwork and his office's chair. When night falls upon the world and the sun's light no longer reaches the streets, I bask in worship to my capture and teacher.

"Tsk, ah! Mphft..." I bite into my lip drawing the iron that flows just under the surface. Trying to conceal my ragged breath and needy voice as I receive my payment and punishment. My hands grip into the mahogany as I brace myself. Spread and with every movement ever closer to being split open. Drool mixing with tiny tears that slide down from my face to the dark gray carpet of the floor.

"Hmm, speak." Was the command. To invoke more of my punishment, as he knew I rather keep silent in this place. When I don't respond right away, I'm struck behind the head causing me to bite deeper on my tongue. "I said speak. Why are you being punished?"

"Ah! Be-because, ugh, I didn't, ah-ha, I didn't finish the raid re-reports for Ah-April!" I choke out between the harsh thrusts. I wanted to rip off the ring, I was so backed up, it was killing me. "AH-and ah, I m-made, daddy aH-angry!"

"What are you going to do next time?" My hips were burning from the force and from rubbing against the hard surface of the desk. My legs had already buckled, so I thanked fate that the object was strong enough to accept my weight.

"Listen t-to daddy!" I called out, the tears running down my sweat covered neck. I had glanced at the clock on the wall, it was well passed that the others in the offices would have already left for home. Even though this shameful yelp of an out burst, was a blow to what little of dignity I had left. Just another part of the payment I owed.

"Good." I could feel my molten reward fill my lower stomach and the rod that delivered it leaving it's accustomed place. The space wasn't empty for long however. Before my prize also followed I was sealed with a slightly larger plug that my loose entrance could barely grip upon. I glance back with hopes of being released, though nothing more than an apathetic glance was given as my god cleaned and readjusted himself. Leaving me with nothing but my neglection to myself, a dull ache I would have to care for after a sore drudge back to his palace. Even my silent whine was met with animosity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There! My first attempt at being dirty! I'm going to drown myself in sweet fluffy easter candy now, because it's only going to get dirtier from here on and I need to rot teeth somehow!


	4. You're no longer my son

What happens to a ghoul when they reach sexual maturity? Their entire body begins to change. If they don't spend much of their childhood devouring high quality RC cells from human corpses, then defects in this change can become apparent. Somehow limiting the chances that they will seek a mate to continue their lines. An evolutionary trait to thin out areas where food is scarce and lower the chances of cannibals being born. This can range from the ghoul searching out mates of the same gender to developing a figure unattracting to the opposite gender. In most cases it is both.

These ghouls are not shunned from their communities as humans with these traits are. Females that fail to mature properly serve better as fighters within their gangs. Males on the other hand tend to help raise the offspring. Even if most ghouls live solitary lives, a mating pair may even seek out these differently developed ghouls to help protect and serve the family unit. In the wild this is important as other ghouls are their biggest threats.

So, what happens when a half-ghoul, who has been raised in a detention center, is only fed low quality RC cells harvested from other ghouls, and recently grew a Kakuja, hit's maturity? You get Kaneki Ken, also known as Mukade. His growth was stunned, so he only measures just above five feet, when he was predicted to grow at least six. His muscles, although firm, never added bulk to his thin frame. Even what little fat he has, served to widen his hips, above his longer than normal legs for his height. His baby like face, from when he was a child also didn't change much, aside from a slightly sharper jaw and a light adam's apple underneath. His large soft eyes, dusted by long eyelashes.

One day Kaneki was having trouble controlling his Kakuja. This was only three days after his body finished maturing according to reports. He ended up going berserk and attacking staff of section E of level 2. The mixture of his newer hormones and the aggressive ones of the Kakuja, made it extremely hard to use standard protocols to regain control over him. Eventually staff resorted to shooting him with RC bullets, before using a heavy sedative.

As usual when he disrupts or causes problems in Cochlea, I must be the one to correct him first. If he doesn't submit, which is mostly the case since he reached the age of ten, the prison's torturer will have a word with him instead. Sometimes I feel as if I should take piety on, this creature whenever the offence is no more than a misunderstanding. Though, he is nothing but a pet, a subject for continued study by the researchers of this place, and when his use is no more... It will be up to me to dispose of him.

The first mistake I did, was check on him. I was waiting for almost an hour on a chair, by his desk in his cell. Compared to the rest of the cells, his was the most furnished. The standard thin bed we provide these creatures, had non-standard pink sheets and pillows with white dots on them. A birthday gift one of the cleaners gave him, left over when their own daughter got new bedding. Stuffed animals cast to different parts of the cell, some set up to look like they are talking with each other, the rest simply laying around in no set position. The white walls covered in crayon, not only on the pieces of paper that accompany the stuffies. The method of the array of colours laying in a small box on the desk.

Kaneki was in a deep sleep on his bed. He's had an allergic reaction to certain sedatives that were used on him before. I wanted to make sure the ghoul wasn't overheating. As soon as I reached out my hand, he pinned me to the floor. Of course I would usually would have noticed or dodge an attack like that, though for some reason I can't bring myself to hurt him, even if it were on accident. He was breathing hard on top of me, face flush and pupils dilated. I try to push him off, the drug used on him was obviously not out of his system. Instead I was met with his red Kagune forcing me still and an all too curious hand running along the buckles of outfit.

Great not only did he freak out, but he's also in heat. If I were advised of this, I would have requested a more contained interview room. Not only am I trapped with a horny ghoul, but I'm trapped with a horny ghoul who I couldn't just kill. As he tried to sate himself all I could do was wait, or risk hurting both of us in the struggle to get free. The closer he reached his goal the quicker he came to realize what he has done.

When I was able to get up, he had curled up into the corner of his bed. He was both shocked and afraid. Mostly afraid. It was obvious now that he overstepped the boundary of 'son', and I not making the wise choice of refusing his advance had passed the point of 'father'. As much as we both wanted to forget this incident of ill judgement, I knew he would do this again. He's no longer this small child with a wild imagination. He's an adult ghoul. Certain things he will do without fully understanding the consequences for. I couldn't slap him on the wrist no longer, when he lost himself to less than human needs. No, he was passed the point where threats were enough to warrant obedience.

Today is where I must now both sate the monster that will attempt to steal my control over his body, and punish his behavior when needed the most. He will not leave my side, he will not be given the choice of 'freedom'. Today is the day his 'life' will start to become meaningless if it is not in service to me. And the day he no longer can be of use... I will slay him.

"D-daddy..?" Those bright silver eyes...

"I'm not angry." Shall become a dulled gray. "Just disappointed in you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This always seems to be longer on in Wordpad then in the editor... Anywho here is Arima's POV of their situation. Of course his information and understanding of ghouls is a bit misguided and based on what the CCG tells him. No one can 100% say what causes Kaneki do to do what he does. He can't explain it either. :P


	5. The Shepherd Ram

A shepherd knows his flock. He knows every ewe that walks his fields, every ram that rests by his shaded tree, and every lamb that wanders off to be eaten by the wolves. With his staff he guides them through that valley cold. Under knowledge that his care for his flock will have them yield to his command and follow his direction. Though this is not love. The shepherd's guidance of the safe pass, is but a ruse as these sheep end up being food to the shepherd in the end. Yet they still follow, because for some reason death by someone you love and trust is a lot less painful to them, than being in between the teeth and jaws of a starving wolf.

"Arima... kun..." The clothing I wear is both heavy and ill fitted. It pulls at my hooves and sags at my boney hips. I keep my tail tucked as the wool doesn't cover it as I struggle not to bite at the rotting skin that flops over my snout.

"Not yet." My shepherd is patient, and kind. He moves with confidence and guides me with his oak staff so I may not get lost. His knowledge is above what I can understand. I take solace in this. And one day maybe he'll enlighten me from the darkness I was bore. "Sit up."

"Please... I... No more..." My pathetic body. Too large for it's own stolen skin, yet too small. How can I be so? My existence isn't, shouldn't be. But here, here I am. Faithless and broken. Lost and scared. Alone, abandoned by my flock. "I'm gonna..."

"I said not yet." In this valley of death, at the mercy of death himself. In this I both receive hope and lose it in a instance. Sin and purity become one in the same and I... I as a whole being to fall into desperation and start to fade into a hollow husk. All I can do is reach up to him, as the beast's claw at my back, and he takes my broken hand delicately.

"D-daddy..!" Hoisted onto his shoulders, he takes his hurt lamb back. He walks ahead of the flock. Thousands of unsure and frightened eyes glance at him with his little lamb. Without a word they cast down their gazes and go back to grazing. Pretending they saw nothing, but their shepherd. "I-I'm sorry! Sorry! Sorry..."

"God dammit Ken!" The lamb is taken to the top of the hill. Upon the flat stone, he ties it down. The lamb brays for help, for it's long gone mother. Soon the lamb no longer brays, soon there is no more lamb. The shepherd knows his flock. His lamb was long dead before they exited the valley. No, that lays still in it's own vile poison is a wolf. A monster, that has threatened both him and his folk for years. Yet, this one did the mistake of trusting the shepherd to accept him.

"I-I... L-love you..."

"I know."

 

*$*

 

Kaneki's condition had rendered him bound to my flat. He has too much freedom working in the office and the complaints I have received solidified my judgement. Maybe it was not wise, maybe it was cruel, but it was necessary. His behavior has reached beyond acceptable, and if I want his life to continue, he had to be removed.

I understand he's no more than a kitten in my hands, but with others he could be a Siberian Tiger. Waiting for a chance to strike as soon as they turn their backs. He is controlled, but it's something I rather not waste time explaining to others in my profession. Ghouls are complex creatures with simple minds, even mindless tasks have proven difficult for my pet.

Everyday I return home exhausted from my work and he greets me with a question. 'May I leave today?'. My answer is always the same. A simple no, so it would not overload his mind. Slowly, he starts to not question his new place. Soon, he becomes quiet.

I watch him move though this space in a practiced motion. His dulling eyes only lighting up when he glances in my direction. He stares out the window at the grey clouds that loom over a world he will never experience. I wonder if he stares at the CCG building, when I'm not here. He's only known walls, a world of rooms, confined spaces. In a cage or death bed, these are the only places a ghoul should be. He should be grateful.

As I sit on the living room sofa reading, my pet joins me. Silently he sits to my right and nervously laid his head on my shoulder. His silky hair had lost all over it's purity, returning to his child-like darkness. Some days he reminds me of that snot-nosed brat he was. Driven to insanity by his neglectful and abusive mother. I knew, the whole organization knew. Half-ghouls don't pass by undetected, no matter how much their parents hide it. Although Kaneki Ken's existence was never hidden.

His real father was a medical researcher from Kyoto. The city is famously known to the CCG as a popular haven for ghouls. Legends and folklore, led many of the citizens to believe ghouls are Yokai. Their presence that serve various gods and to have a family member eaten or partially eaten is a sign of good luck or blessing on their families. Kaneki's father was a ghoul working on a solution to lower the amount of ghoul related deaths, through ethical means.

When he moved to Tokyo under request by the CCG and promise of protection, he married a human female. She soon became pregnant and gave birth to a small healthy male half-ghoul, she name Ken. From there the relationship broke down. Kaneki's father wasn't much of a man as he was ghoul. Though he made the decision to leave his child with the unstable woman, in fears that he would end up hurting both if he were to retaliate. That night he climbed up to the roof of the CCG building, jumped off, and left this world behind.

I for one only met him a few times. He was energetic, positive, and easily fascinated by mundane human life. Even the days leading to his suicide, no one could say he wasn't any different. He had a strange fascination with grammatical puns, usually they were quite weak, but his smile always made up for his inept attempts at humor.

Curiously I wonder how he would react to his only son, purring on my lap. Stealing chaste kisses as he wears lingerie ment for a woman of similar height.

Kaneki's body is more beautiful every session we have. His pale skin heating up at my ice cold touch. His blown out eyes, lidded with coy glances. The way he submits in attempts to pleasure and please me.

My lust is no more than trivial. This is for him. I cannot deny this part of his nature, his mind unable to focus on anything else then phalluses and breeding. The simple mind of a ghoul. To him this is a treat, this is a reward. It's both sad and arousing, to see the need and control his body has over everything else. The hunger of a ghoul cannot be denied. He knows his place, he knows not to bite the 'hand' that feeds him. Though I do not trust him fully still.

I pull his hot mouth away, enlisting an upset whine. Pulling him up and laying him on the plush sofa, I feel down his overly excited body. His entrance more than malleable and soft. As he tried to grind against my right hand, I reach over to the end table.

Once the gel is applied, he can barely contain himself. If I was not quick, he would have remembered his strength and over powered me. Once I entered, he melted back into docility and tried to chase after my thrusts.

It might be my age, or simply my failing health, but my stamina isn't what it used to be. Embarrassing though, I request him to take care of himself. His eagerness takes a slight blow to me, though he set a pace I could no longer achieve. As punishment I deny his single minded goals. This was also not wise, since he quickly lost control over his Kagune and he ended up slicing the sofa in half and breaking the coffee table.

He curled up in his favorite corner of the room, when he heard my too angry of a voice shout in surprise. He never truly left Cochlea. He will forever be a prisoner there. This sad, pathetic creature.

There is an old question his real father used to say. 'What if god hides in heaven, because he is afraid of what he created?'. I wonder is this what he meant, wolves become fearful when the sheep start to fight back.

Interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Currently going to be my last chapter for this story. I'm getting too personal with this. I might update a pure smut chapter with full descriptions form a 3rd person POV, no promises though. (I just realized the title of this chapter sounds like an awesome bar/pub name!)

**Author's Note:**

> Make this smutty Kisa... Smutty... Kinky... Dirty thoughts... Stop blushing and running away from the computer dammit!
> 
> (Note to self: Write longer f#cking chapters, you are going to commit to this one!)


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